At the Heart of It All

I have a love-hate relationship with Valentine's Day.  When I was in Grad school, we studied how the De Beers company literally fabricated the engagement ring phenomenon to boost diamond sales (don't believe me?  click here for the science!).    All this talk about love and romance, as if love isn't hard work that has to be cultivated year round.  Chocolate becomes comfort food for women feeling the lack of true love in their lives- married or single. I'm not sure if it's true, but I read somewhere that there are more arguments and break-ups on Valentine's Day then any other day of the year.  And then there's red and pink hearts everywhere!!!  Give me a break.

But then there's the other side of me that LOVES this month dedicated to love!  i love the pink and red everywhere- there's a 'girly girl' deep, deep inside that gets a lil' bit excited by lace and frills.  I love those little message heart candies- they are DELICIOUS and... dare I say? Slightly addictive.  And yes, I understand that true love requires hard work, commitment, generosity, forgiveness, and compassion. Not for the faint of heart, for sure. But I love  the opportunity to break out of the mundane routine-  spicing up our relationships by turning up the romance, turning up the sexy.   

But I most of all I love Valentine's Day because i've made those little hearts my personal reminder of a beautiful, sacred philosophy:

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In Classical Chinese Medicine, the heart is considered the house of all emotions, our awareness, and intelligence.  A better translation of the character is actually  heart-mind, because it is the heart that is able to translate all of our feelings, experiences and information into meaning.   In fact, as a symbolic language, the characters of all the emotions in Chinese writing contain the glyph for "heart", and when the heart is disturbed with tumultuous emotions, the spirit cannot rest. It's no coincidence that the Ancient Kemetic philosophy, keeping one's heart as "light as a feather" was a central spiritual truth  (and no coincidence that the hieroglyph for heart looks very similar to the Classical Chinese glyph for heart.  hmmmmmmm).

And while the heart represents the capacity for connection with others, it also allows us to acknowledge our true nature and the capacity to intimate with ourselves.

So with this in mind, here are some great ways to make this Valentine's Day, this month, this year,
this life an opportunity to love YOURSELF....  more and more and more!

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1. Listen to Your Heart   
By first loving ourselves fully and unconditionally, we can extend that love to others. So literally make a playlist of  love songs to yourself!  These can be songs that remind you of your essential nature, and reflect your greatness back you.  My favorite oldies but goodies include "Self-Love" by Jaguar Wright and "More to Life" by Fertile Ground.   

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2. Radiate Loving-Kindness  Metta meditation is a practice focused on sending loving kindness- first to yourself, and then to others.  Click here for more information on Metta.    

3.  Practice Gratitude
Taking a moment of silent gratitude for those you love, especially in times of conflict, has tremendous healing power.  Keeping a daily log of the things you are most grateful for is a great way to keep your heart open... and smiling.

4. Explore your Sensual Side  
As you'll explore in the Sacred Sexuality: Discovering the Goddess Within online course, true sensuality begins with your relationship to yourself.  We can live our lives in with such joy and juiciness that even grocery shopping can be orgasmic!!!  Here are my favorite flower essences for cultivating your sensuality:

Hibiscus: helps to form a bridge between sexuality and heart-centered sensuality, especially when sex feels cold or detached.

Alpine Lily:  helps to integrate the root and crown chakras, so that spirituality and sexuality can both live in the embrace of the divine feminine

Pussy Paws: increases ones ability to receive and explore the sensation of touch, opening the boundaries between self and other.

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p.s:  You can make a super sexy self-massage oil with these three flower essences along with fragrant Click here for the recipe! 

essential oils! 

How are you showing yourself love this year?

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